Speed Dating #2

Given that my first experience with speed dating was 99.9% awful, I decided to give it another try with a different company this past Thursday. This company provides a different location (dark bar in SF over a bright community center in Albany), better age range (26-35 over 30-45), and an overall better atmosphere. 

Drank and I headed to the city, making it just.in.time. We didn't get there early enough to survey the guys or the competition. We picked a seat, and waited for the guys to come 'round. It started off awkwardly like this type of thing always does, but 7 minutes is enough time to calm down and just chat. As usual, most guys were in some sort of web job, there must be a law for that or something. Some seemed to like Second Life or World of Warcraft more than human interaction, but all in all they were super cool guys who had interesting lives and were easy to talk to. 

All except for one. 

They must have been short a few people because they let this 22 year old kid in. He saunters up to the stool and before he even sits down in front of me, he says, "So what's my competition like?" Weird question. I thought to myself 'we're only talking for 7 minutes, who cares what everyone else is like...?' but I all I said was, "they are really cool guys." and his reply was, "that wasn't the right answer, you were supposed to say that last guy was a jerk." 

All right, I see how this is going to go. He's not attractive, he is short, and arrogant as all get out. You all know how I feel about arrogant people... 

I just wanted this longest 7 minutes ever to be over with, so I let him talk. I asked him what he did for a living, he said, "I'm a director at a learning center. I have a JOB in this ECONOMY. I have a JOB in this ECONOMY." Yeah, I get that. I do too. Moving on... 

Him: "So I'm the youngest person in here. I'm 22."

Me: "Oh you're 22....."

Him: "Well how old are you?"

Me: "I'm 30 and you're 22......yeeaaahhhh."

Him: "Well you don't look 30 if that helps."

Me: "Oh wow, thanks."

Him: "I mean, I'm looking for a young professional because I have JOB in this ECONOMY." 

Me: I got nothing.

(Is 7 minutes over yet??)

Me: "So where did you grow up?"

Him: "Born and raised Bay Area." Stares at me.

Me: "Oh I grew up in the Bay Area too, San Rafael."

Him, with attitude: "That's not the Bay Area." 

Me, with attitude: "Are you kidding? It's 20 min from the city, that's closer than San Jose."

Him: "That's not Bay Area. That's the North Bay."

Me, thinking: I'm getting nowhere. That's enough fighting with a 22 year old for a day.

I met some interesting people, girls included, and had a really fun time. It's pretty expensive, so I'll probably only go every few months, but hey, even if I meet no one, these make for very, very good stories.

Blog Topics

I want it on record that there are certain things you shouldn't blog about, unless you happen to be an expert in the field of your topic, aka doctor, nurse, biologist, researcher, police officer, etc.

One would be your child's birth. I know that it's awesome and miraculous and all that. Your feelings about it are ok, welcome even, but your description of what the placenta looked like or what crap was on your slimy baby when it first popped out or the unexpected things that happened to you should be off limits. Maybe I say this because I have yet to have a kid and I don't truly know how awesome and incredible it is. But honestly, no one really needs to know the intimate details about that life event. They don't. If they wanted to, they'd look it up on webmd.com or ask their mom or doctor. If you blog about it, I'll never look at you the same way again. Some things need to be left as a surprise.

Another would be your period. No one needs to chat about it like we're talking about what you're going to eat for dinner. As women, we all know how annoying it is, how it always comes at the most inopportune time, and how it's usually accompanied by pain, discomfort, anger and tears. We know that without this monthly fun time, we can't have babies. That doesn't make it some amazing topic that you need to tell me about. I already know, and no, most chicks don't think it's a blessing or a miracle. At this point, you'd think I was used to it, but without fail, every month, I'm annoyed, disappointed, and frustrated by its presence. Did I just blog about my feelings on that topic? Sorry.

Yet another is writing about any toilet duties. Bloggers are mostly adults, and other adults don't really need to know much about that topic. We already do - we've been doing it for a long time, and we know how it works. That's enough for me. The occasional fart or burp joke is, of course, funny.

In general, bloggers shouldn't write about things they know nothing about but act like they do. The flip side of this is if you're funny. I don't care what you write about as long as you entertain me for the 5 minutes I'm on your blog. Granted, it's not my place to tell anyone what to write about, but there sure are some topics that I don't like to think about, let alone read about in someone else's blog. I'm not trying to tell you what to do, but ok, I am. Don't. Please. The blogsphere will be eternally grateful if you'd keep the bodily function topics to a minimum.

GoKart Racing

Hello, I'm Slowpoke. I recently competed in a race in Burlingame, placing 10th in my race and 48th for the day. Not bad, considering there 723 racers. I'm really good.

Fine, the truth. There were 15 racers when I placed 10th and 67 racers of the day when I placed 48th. I rocked. HA! My dad took a bunch of us to the Go Kart Racer in Burlingame - it was AWESOME!!! Those little karts go pretty fast and the steering is tough. I'm really sore....I had to use my whole body to steer because my arms are wimpy wimpy wimpy. We had such a great time and I can't wait to do it again!!

Craigslist

As I stand here in my empty condo in Sonoma, I feel the need to vent about how annoying and flakey Craigslist people are. Don't tell me you're looking forward to seeing the apartment ("see you Saturday!") then not show up. I have a life too, ya know. I don't exactly LOVE standing in the kitchen of a condo I can't sell or even seem to rent. I have no chair, no music, no luxuries of home, but I am stealing someone's internet and that's cool.

Overall, I tout the awesomeness that is Craigslist....I have purchased my sectional, TV cabinet, cool shelves, bookcases, loveseat, gas dryer, coffee table, night stand, patio furniture, and bed all on Craigslist. I found an apartment when I lived in the city and my pervious car. I've sold a bunch of furniture, including my couch set and a secretary desk.

That said, WHY ARE PEOPLE SUCH FLAKES?!? Why oh why do they hide behind the interweb and say one thing and do another? If you see my ad, you email me, we have correspondence, you have my email address and phone number...just let me know you aren't coming. I don't care why, I just don't want to waste gas and time coming over here if I don't have to!

Ok that's all. It's not you, Craigslist, it's your users.

Feelings.....Not So Many...Feeeeeelingss....

Last night, Wenis and I attended the Napa Chamber of Commerce mixer at Black Stallion winery. The winery itself was gorgeous - it's pretty new, so I expected it to be pretty - and Wenis said the Syrah was good. I wish my house looked like that....

We met some very cool people, and saw a couple I wasn't too excited to see. The night was good - $20 good? Um, maybe not - but it's good for me to get out there and meet new people.

A note about my feelings on seeing people I didn't want to see - I feel nothing. I didn't overreact, I didn't get overly nervous, I didn't turn beet red, I didn't care. This is an incredible feeling - this not caring thing. I have my life, it revolves around me and my friends and my family and my experiences, and it does not involve those people. They do not have the stronghold they had yesterday, last month, last year. They are nothing to me and it feels awesome.

Cheers to realizing what I already knew but didn't see!

30 Days What?

It's been almost thirty days since I've posted. Oops. I've been a tad overwhelmed with life and blogging took the backseat.

All I have to say right now is that I am sitting in a hotel room, freaking out because I have to take a public speaking course for the next three days. I'm going to die. Actually, I would rather die. I am so not good at this.

Napa Young Professionals Society

Last night I attended the first Napa Young Professionals Society event, started by two guys in Napa who saw the need and filled it. Ceja Vineyards opened their Tasting Salon in downtown Napa for us - what a great space. PS - they have salsa dancing on Saturday nights if anyone wants to come with me sometime!

Please take note - there ARE young people in Napa! Who knew!?! I'll definitely keep up with this group - I met some relaly great nice people and the opportunity for new friends and business networking is endless. Thanks to Lee and Tyler for creating this and making it happen.

Hm.

So I kind of haven't done much of anything on my list. Something I did do was join the gym on Monday, actually went to the gym on Tuesday, and thought about going today. Pretty good for me. 

I have a secret TV love: The Starter Wife. I usually talk about my love of trashy reality TV, shows like Rock of Love (how can you not love Bret Michaels' incessant references to Every Rose Has Its Thorn and the weave under his bandana?), Rock of Love Charm School (Thou Shalt Rock It With Style), American Idol bad singers (HUGE props to Julie's Journal where I found this hilarious blog entry about one of my most memorable AI 'singers' - I specifically like the "would you please harness those udders!" - awesome.), and many, many more (oh, like Bad Girls Club....shoot me now but I love it) that I truly got DVR for again.

Back to The Starter Wife. Now, I am a fan of Debra Messing (I heart Will & Grace - and I heart Mr. Durfee's site dedicated to W&G!). Her mannerisms and commentary are just so funny. I watched the miniseries when it came out, and have been watching the show religiously since it started this season. I know some of it's a little far-fetched, but have you watched Desperate Housewives lately? No? Ok, well I have, and it's pretty out there. I do not watch TV to have it mirror real life. What's the fun in that? I already live real life, and for the most part, it's not exciting at all. Throw me some chick fights, ex-hair band losers, murders in Beverly Hills, tornadoes, random health issues that only one man can solve, two business fires, and a good solid mystery and I'm game. All I ask is that no more than two good shows come on at the same time (my DVR can only handle two) and we're all good.

I swear I get off the couch sometimes. Really. I do.

Cheers to bad TV and joining the gym! Now if I could just get the two to hold hands and be a couple, we'd have a nice and tidy family here.

Words That Make You Go EW.

Almost everyone I know has a list of words that they hate. At work we now just call it The List, as in "ew don't say that, it's on the list." Some words on our list...

--Maggot: just gross in every way, shape and form. The word itself is gross sounding, maggots themselves give me the heebie jeebies, and well, ew. A certain someone thinks these are magical creatures because their secretions* heal wounds or something disgusting like that. Dude. The day I let maggots on me is the day you can send me across the street to Napa State (word).

--*Secretion: What a nasty word. It sounds like just what it is...something oozing out of something else. It starts off as such a lovely word too - secret - then goes HA IN YO FACE - and then the 'tion' hits. Changes everything.

--Panties: Call them underwear please. Please.

--Loin: And now begins the infamous "oi" words. For some reason 'pork loin' doesn't bother me as much as 'his loins' but it's a pretty icky word nonetheless.

--Moist: Ew. Ew. EWW. Everything about this word grosses me out. Can't we all just get along and say, "Wow! This cake is the most not-dry cake I've ever had! It's incredible!" Thanks.

--Ointment: Bah. Anything you have to put ointment on is probably something you wouldn't discuss with just anyone. I suggest using 'cream' or 'salve' or even flat out 'Neosporin' instead.

--Crotch: You may be seeing a pattern here but I swear that's just a coincidence. Crotch is an ugly word, I mean, why use it when there are so many others?

I know I'm forgetting some, but I'll post those when I remember. What words are on your List?

If you're reading this blog, then you use the interweb and all of its glory. To avoid using any of the words on The List, please visit www.thesaurus.com for assistance.

More Things To Do...Before I Turn 31

20: Take another swing dance lesson.

21: Find a kickboxing class I love.

22: Pay cash for 5 purchases over $30 (maybe it'll deter me from spending $50+ EVERY TIME I go to Target!)

23: See Citizen Kane

24: Master the art of the Bloody Mary

25: Shoot at least 25 photos per week

Babies

I often wonder what it will be like to be married and have kids. It'll be so different than my current life that I can hardly imagine living that far away life. I looooove babies, and I wonder sometimes what I would do if I had an ugly baby. I know it's a horrible thing to say, and I'll think my baby is adorable, blah blah blah. But seriously, what if my baby isn't cute? Is there such a thing as BABY GOGGLES - a phenomenon where parents automatically think their baby is cute even if it isn't? Think beer goggles but with no alcohol involved. You're looking at your kid and you think oh my, I created this beautiful little bundle of joy and all the while everyone else thinks, oy, that kid is uuuugggllyyy.

I just entered it into Urban Dictionary. Hopefully it'll be approved soon and I'll go down in history as the chick who made up Baby Goggles. Thank you and goodnight.

Still Reeling a Little

I'm still a tad on edge from Sunday. I guess it's more of the Law&Ordercrimespree that is bothering me....I read so much bad news all the time and so many people get shot on a daily basis and it's much easier than I thought to shoot a gun. On one hand, I must admit, it was sort of a thrill to pull the trigger. On the other, it was scary. I'm glad that I'm still scared of guns. I don't plan on ever owning one and if for some reason someone came into my life who did own them, at least I'd know that I was scared and be OVERLY sure that they were secured and safe. Ok that's all. Talk about analyzing something to bits. Sheesh.

On a lighter note, I felt like I was getting sick all day yesterday, so I made soup last night. Knowing me, you probably think this entails grabbing a Campbell's can, getting out the can opener, and voila - soup. Think again (and be surprised...) - I MADE SOUP. As in, chicken stock, carrots, celery, chicken, pasta, spices. I made chicken noodle soup! I am so shocked and proud of myself that I'm going to eat it for lunch today too. Also, there's so much I'll be eating it for dinner and for lunch tomorrow, but that's beside the point.

Cheers to being scared of guns and making chicken noodle soup!

#15: Shoot a gun - Check.

Usually my dad will call and ask if I want to go shooting with him and my brothers. I've always been too scared, but this time I went. Hey, it's on my list. 

On the drive to Petaluma, I was pretty nervous, planning on only shooting once and then being done with it. Of course, my brothers and dad wouldn't let me get away with that. I had to shoot each one and learn all about it. Earplugs in and big sound blocking ear things on, I started with the littlest one, a 38 special. Not sure why it's special. That little gun was straight out of Clue - Colonel Mustard in the conservatory with the revolver. Myself in a field in Petaluma with a revolver. Crazy. The 38 had some kick, and being the wuss that I am, it actually sort of hurt my hand. Next...

I then shot the 45 revolver one - it was big and heavy and way scary. Again, the hand was hurt, and this one was WAY louder. It was a Smith & Wesson and you can now call me Clint Eastwood.

My dad has this beautiful gun (did I just say that?) that's used in Olympic shooting. The wood is carved out and fits over your hand and the trigger is extremely sensitive. Pretty cool, not difficult, and neat looking. 

Next was the 22 rifle. I had sworn that I was not going to shoot a rifle, but I was told that this had no kickback. It didn't. It was weenie. Either I was getting jaded or it was just less gun than I expected for how big it was. I had no idea weather I actually hit a target with any of these, I couldn't see that far and was WAY too stressed out to care. At the end, I shot this one again and was a pretty good shot - hit a clay pigeon (does not look like a pigeon at all and I'm not even sure it's clay) just about in the middle from 100 yards. If my dad was amazed, it must have been pretty good.

Still tense, I headed back to try the two that looked straight out of Grand Theft Auto. The kick on them was way too much for me...I guess I'm not ready to shoot drug dealers just yet, only cowboys. The clip looked like a Pez dispenser and it pretty much worked just like that. Since I had reduced a deadly weapon to a child's candy toy, I decided to head out.

I am still a bundle of nerves, wound up nice and tight. The whole experience was scary and stressful and nerve wracking for me, but I'm glad I did it. I'd do it again too, I just need some time to recover (and a massage).

Cheers to conquering a fear and crossing my first item off the 31 List!

More Things To Do...

15: Shoot a gun
16: Walk across the Golden Gate Bridge
17: Visit the Cable Car Museum
18: Learn 3 all-purpose jokes (not horrible ones like "What does a one-legged ballerina wear? A one-one.)
19: Go on a date with someone over 40 (uuuuhhh) and someone under 30. (can't this be retroactive Ngocstar? Oy.)

Ok...we're getting there...just 12 more...

31 Flavors

In 5 months and 13 days, I turn 31. Thanks to some creative suggestions, I've updated my list... Here goes the beginning, in no particular order. Send more!

1. Learn to make Belgian waffles like my dad's

2. Visit Gabe & Jen in NY (this will probably happen after May 7, I'm thinking more like June...)

3. Visit Morgan & Bobby in Martha's Vineyard (I'm looking into make #s 2 & 3 one big trip!)

4. Run the Maui marathon with Team in Training in Sept 08 (again, after May 7, but I'll need to start training soon so I don't die)

5. Try all 31 flavors at Baskin Robbins

6. Take a picnic to the beach

7. Tahoe trip

8. EDIT: Put $10 on 31 and hope for the best (I had a good suggestion: put it on 31!)

9. Rita's for some rockin' karaoke

10. Play a practical joke on a friend

11. Drive east and shoot the whole way

12. Visit Half Moon Bay

13. Host a dinner party

14. Volunteer for a day

...That's as far as I've gotten...help!

31 Things to Do Before I Turn 31

Thanks to Jessica, a new friend from the Wine Blogger Conference, for the coolest idea. I am putting a call out to you, my faithful readers, all 3 of you, to help me compile a list of 31 things to do before I turn 31.

I haven't given it enough thought, but I'd better get on it as I only have 170 days to finish all of these things, whatever they may be.

One thing that had originally been on my list was take a random lesson at the JC, which I have already done, so it doesn't count. I guess I can always do another one...

I'll start, you send me ideas...

1. Learn how to make Belgian waffles like my dad's
2.
3.
...you get the idea.

Linked Up

I'm talking to Wenis at the moment and we are trademarking yet another word.

Blink: Blog Links (if you Urban Dictionary this one, you get some interesting things. I am not responsible for the content provided on Urban Dictionary. Viewer discretion is advised.)

I have learned that the more links you put in your blog, the more traffic you get. I've tried this but have yet to see a real upswing. I'll put random blinks in and see what happens...

--One of the coolest websites ever
--I want, need, covet, desire, drool over, passionately adore this
--I want to buy this

Cheers to etymology and all things word related, including word creation!

I (left my) HEART (in) SAN FRANCISCO

This past weeked, I took MtotheG to the city for a much needed weekend away. I took her to the non-touristy spots (like Howard and 5th) and pointed out little tidbits here and there. I was a regular tour guide. MtotheG may not have thought so, but I had fun :)

After a short shopping trip and a session at the Apple Store, we headed back to the Marina to get ready for dinner. This is a huge event because we went to Betelnut - one of my most favorite restaurants ever. Ever. Really. Ever. I heart the Hoison Pork. I heart the lettuce wraps. I heart the samosas. I heart the PomPom cocktail. I heart the chefs. Though I don't heart the freaky fish dish (looks a lot like this little bugger), I still respect the freaky fried fish.

After a night out on the town (and this time when I say "on the town" I really mean it.), I remembered how much I love it there and I sort of want to move back. I think about how much my life would have to change for that to happen, but the bustling of downtown, the people who bump into you and don't say sorry, the crazy drivers, the pricey parking, the overpriced food...I truly miss it. I miss the option of meeting new people everytime I go out, the plethora (yeah, that's right, that's a $20 word right there) of places to go and things to see, the everchanging weather, the proximity (banked another $20) to the ocean...all of it. I know that part of me is reliving my early 20s, getting all nostalgic about places that aren't there any more or aren't *the* place to go, but for the most part I think I'm just getting restless. That it's not about moving to the city at all. I'm trying to find my happy place, as lame as that sounds, and I need to keep looking. I need to realize what I have, who I have, be happy for all of it, and be content.

Cheers to finding my happy place in the most non-psycho way possible!

Why Cars Get Hit by Trains is Beyond Me.

My drive to work is about 40 minutes each way on a good day, so in the mornings I listen to all different radio stations depending on how I feel. Usually my dial (dial - HA - why is it still called a dial?) ends up on Live 105, and I listen to the randomness that is the Woody Show.

They're entertaining, someone usually laughs hysterically which we all know is contagious, and it's great chatter for my drive to work. Today in their news segment, they reported that Caltrain was late because it struck a car. It seems like there's a story like that every month at least.

Let me back up for a second. This is a train & these are train tracks.

The train cannot drive on the street and cars should not drive on the tracks. I'm not sure why this seems to be such a difficult concept for some. A train hits a car - how is that even possible? It's not like the train drove off of the tracks and was like "hey, I think I need to hit that car" or anything. I can understand a car hitting another car - two people who aren't paying attention in moving vehicles. I get it. What I don't get is how someone in a car, in the bright morning rush hour probably on the same route that they drive every day, can be sitting on the tracks of a moving train, and not move. You know you're on train tracks - it's pretty obvious. Next time you're driving, note that there may be train tracks in front of you, behind you, under you, and get out of the way. It's a train for pete's sake. Move.

Cheers to my rant.

Random Thoughts

Thought 1: I am so excited that I witnessed such a historical moment last night. I think about when I'm a grandma (hopefully I'll be one!), I'll be able to take my grandkid's history books and say, "See that? When Mr. Obama became president? I was sitting on my couch eating leftover creamy polenta and microwaved broccoli when I watched Obama's acceptance speech." They'll probably look at my like I'm crazy, but I can't wait to be the crazy grandma with all the crazy stories.

Thought 2: I'm cold. Brrrrr. I turned on my heat last night for the first time since probably April. Baby, it's cold outside. (ok, according to weather.com, it's only 55 out there. Sure feels like 35 if you ask me.)

Thought 3: Don't ever let little chicks with big heels land on your toe. Ever. My poor, broken, left big toe is all of the colors of a black, blue and purple rainbow, and I still can't wear cute heels. I hate that chick.

Thought 4: Halloween is a such a rad holiday. People are so creative (myself and my friends included) and it's so fun to people watch. It's also so heartwarming to watch the children's faces light up and smile at their discolored teeth from all the candy. (WENIS - that was just for you. Grrrrrr).

Thought 5: I know it's only 9:26pm on a Wednesday, but I'm going to bed. Goodnight.

Cheers to random thoughts! May they always be with you.